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They never went away, but I'd quickly learned to ignore them. I wondered if I could concentrate hard enough to actually hear them, to understand what it was they were saying."Mr. Raines..." I smiled and surrendered to his warm hug. I let him envelope me in his arms, wondering what he really looked like beneath that human facade. It was hard to imagine that I embraced an angel, and even more so when I considered the fact that I was a vampire. There seemed to be something very wrong with that picture."You'll have to call me Edward now." He stood back smiling, holding my arms just below my shoulders."Mmmm ... That'll be weird," I laughed.He greeted Valentine casually, but Edward was obviously focused on me, concerned perhaps as he took me by the hand and walked with me into the church."How do you feel?" he asked me, his voice echoing faintly through the empty basement."I feel good," I shrugged. "I'm getting used to it." Are you?" He paused, turning to look into my eyes, and I thought I. I try to stay awake to look out for her when she comes home, but I usually fall asleep. Anyway, last night about midnight, I hid in the shed behind the boat. When she came home, she got out of someone's car buttoning her blouse, then she took her panties out of her purse and slipped them on. It was at that moment, crouched behind the boat, that I noticed a hairline crack in the outboard motor mounting bracket. Is that something I can weld, or do I need to replace the whole bracket?"BRITISH HUMOR IS DIFFERENTThese are classified ads, which were actually placed in U.K. Newspapers:FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER8 years old,Hateful little bastard.Bites!FREE PUPPIES1/2 Cocker Spaniel, 1/2 sneaky neighbor's dog.FREE PUPPIESMother is a Kennel Club registered German Shepherd.Father is a Super Dog, able to leap tall fences in a single bound.COWS, CALVES: NEVER BRED.Also 1 gay bull for sale...JOINING NUDIST COLONY!Must sell washer and dryer £100...WEDDING DRESS FOR SALE.Worn once by mistake.Call.
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